Home IS where the heart is!

I found myself locked, in a cage not allowing myself to walk around or have any room to think. I only wanted one thing- anger.  I was gasping for hatred like a man gasps for air instead of gasping for God..Confused on where my home was, or if i even had one- but i do. My address is 54205 Washington Chesterfield Michigan 48047,  my home is not an ordinary home, I'm not there most of the time, in fact I'm only there once or twice a week, on certain days of the weeks my hallways are filled with the kind of people i long to be- believers.Some people  call it Chesterfield Woods Church of the Nazarene- but, i call it home.  I call it home because, that's the place i can be the real me, not afraid of what people think because it's not up to them- it's only up to Him. It's my home because that's the place i long for when i have struggles in my life, that i cannot control.

Church this week was nothing but amazing, i felt like Pastor Goche and Pastor Lerrin were speaking directly to me, about fighting for your faith, and even though we have daily struggles, God is not intimidated by us.  Out of every sermon each of them have given. yesterday touched me the most.  I know deep down that everything is going to be okay, it's a long battle. I'm going to find myself having days  that are great, and having days that i just want to give up- but with God on my side along with everyone else  i know i can persevere and finish the race.

When life throws it's doubts, and nothing feels right- all i have to do is just stop what I'm doing fall to my knee's and pray.  People assume that being a Christ follower not matter what religion you are is easier- well i can certainly advocate that that's sooo not true.  When someone commits their life to Jesus, they promise that they will obey Him- that they will not let temptation get the best of them. When you are a Christ follower- you have to stick up for YOUR God, even when times are rough. You have to know and believe that He will take care of everything. You never know the outcome of everything, so it's up to you to pray until you can't pray anymore.  Being a Christ follower is so much more difficult than being a non believer, because everything that you do, he can see and it either impresses or dis impresses him. Even though being a Christ follower is harder, i would have it no other way.

If there's one thing I've learned the last 48 hours, it's;  Anyone can give up, It's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone is waiting for you to fall apart? That's true strength.  I have yet conquered the daily struggle of staying afloat in this deep ocean we call life, but everyday i am learning new strategies to keep my head out of the water.

We all sin, all of us everyday. But if God can forgive us of our daily sins, why can't we forgive those who sin against us?

Something has been laying on my heart these last few weeks and that is whether or not i am going to continue the same cycle of life i have the last few years. I'm not sure, making some big decisions and I'm scared of the possible outcomes. I've been weighing the pros's and con's in my head, and i think I've made up my mind. I'm praying that God will guide me through this decision and let me know whether or not I'm making the right choice.