Monday, March 26, 2012

Mommy, can you hear me?

This evening, (Monday) was our induction into the National Honor Society. It was amazing don't get me wrong, but something was missing...... my mom was missing.

When i got home, i ran to my room to start writing, because that's what i do when i'm in pain.  And i wrote this; nothing spectacular just my heart trying to patch itself up.

Tonight, reminded me of you. Every time parents were mentioned i thought of you. I thought about how much it would of meant to me if you would have been there. But than i remembered. When you left, you left all of the amazing moments that i will face in high-school. You will never be at those things because of your choice. Mommy, sometimes it hurts so bad. No matter how much i tell people i don't miss you, i do. Tonight was a night that i will never forget, and one you will never remember because you were not there. I miss you mom, and i hope one day you realize how much i am trying to make you proud, even though you don't care enough to see 


It's hard to admit, but i really do miss her sometimes.   I went to the induction with Mr. and Mrs. Robinson and my aunt.  It was hard seeing all of the kids hugging their parents. But- it's something that i have to deal with.  At the induction, one of the board members sang a song that i've played on the guitar myself many times, and that i use as a pick me up song when i am down.  It's called Stand by Rascal Flatts.  Thats when my mom came to my mind a lot more. 

It's hard- but i know that God has everything under control.   Sometimes it hurts more than other times, but i will always remember that every second i could be thinking about the pain my mom puts me through, could be a second i could be thinking about the people who will be by my side no matter what. 

I'm going to post the song below, because it's a really good song! (: 


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